Tag as a rough-and-ready physical game might be on the wane in schools, but it's flourishing in the blogosphere. The Education Wonks tagged me in the game of "If I could be...."
I get to choose five questions and answer, then tag three other bloggers. The questions:If I could be a scientist...If I could be a farmer...If I could be a musician...If I could be a doctor...If I could be a painter...If I could be a gardener...If I could be a missionary...If I could be a chef...If I could be an architect...If I could be a linguist...If I could be a psychologist...If I could be a librarian...If I could be an athlete...If I could be a lawyer...If I could be an inn-keeper...If I could be a professor...If I could be a writer...If I could be a llama-rider...If I could be a bonnie pirate...If I could be an astronaut...If I could be a world famous blogger...If I could be a justice on any one court in the world...If I could be married to any current famous political figure...
Very amusing, and since I already consider myself a scientist, a psychologist, a writer, and a librarian (I do have a library, 'tho it's a small one), does that make four of the five? No? Okay then.
If I could be an astronaut...I'd live in a space ship forever. I love small spaces, prepackaged food, and the idea of zero gravity. (The concept of having "no weight" is one that appeals to me, for obvious reasons.) Oh, I'd go outside every once in a while to photograph an amazing star formation or two, but on the whole I'd be happy inside my little rocket ship. Landing on a planet would be nice, but the journey's half the fun.
If I could be an athlete...I'd be an expert in Muy Thai, or Thai kickboxing. I used to take classes in that at the Princeton Academy of Martial Arts , and I loved it. Anyone see, Jackass, the Movie? Remember the scene where one guy gets his arse kicked by a girl in about 90 seconds flat? I really, really want to be that girl.
If I could be a doctor...I'd be a veterinarian, not a physician. Let's face it - the malpractice insurance rates are lower, the lawsuits appear less frequently, and the patients are cuter, even when they're sick. Maybe especially when they're sick. Plus, what other medical office functions well when overrun with critters, to the point where the receptionist has to shoo two cats and an iguana off the appointment book just to schedule your next visit? If a physician's office were filled with stray, loitering humans, just hanging around taking up space, things would look weird and out of control; when a vet's office is stuffed with spare animals, hey, that's a sign of a good cat whisperer. I like that.
If I could be a professor...I'd be tucked away in a tiny little provincial-yet-tony liberal arts college, known as the eccentric, geeky Dr. Swygert who teaches Latin and collects pet cats. I'd be a very tough grader but very fair with my students, and I'd do my damndest to get young men and women interested in this "dead language," as they say. I'd wear thick glasses and sensible shoes, yet I'd date the handsome young basketball coach, just to shake up people's expectations. I'd be the oddball who says politically-incorrect things in faculty meetings and drives the liberal student leaders nuts, but every year I'd find one or two like-minded students who saw the beauty of the language, and recognized it as a link to the ancients.
If I could be a llama-rider...I'd have to lose a lot of weight. I could see this llama being smart enough to say, "You think you're riding on MY back, after all those Hershey's Kisses and Nutter Butters? Amstel Light is not a diet drink when you have 10 at a sitting, toots. I'm laying right here and not budging until you get off and that cute little blonde kid gets back on."
Paying it forward: I'm tagging John Rosenberg, Daryl Cobranchi, and the lovely Anchoress.
Posted by kswygert at May 17, 2005 08:08 PM